sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
