why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
