Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize