I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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