I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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