Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
