If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
