So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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