I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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