Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
