Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize