i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize