I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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