So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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