Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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