Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
