Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
How does one acquire holy water?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize