Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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