A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
