I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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