This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
