Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize