good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize