To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
