I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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