Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
