i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
