I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
