If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
