I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
