It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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