I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
