I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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