what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I should be sponsored by Trojan
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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