Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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