is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
