If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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