Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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