I think i peed on brittanys purse
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize