Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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