So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
