i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
