Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
