Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
