she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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