Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
