drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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