i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
