I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
