Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
